The Art of Non-Reaction
- Neil Freebern
- 6 days ago
- 3 min read
I came across and interesting TicToc video that tied into my thinking on Upekkha and how to manage navigating challenging moments, event, people in our lives. I analyzed the key points and synthesized them here so that I can come back and review these concepts in the future.
How to Reclaim Your Peace and Inner Power
🌪 The Problem: Emotional Hijacking
A rude text, a sharp tone, or a traffic delay can hijack our peace.
We react instantly—anger, anxiety, defensiveness.
It’s not the event, but our reaction that causes suffering.
Modern psychology calls this emotional hijacking.
Buddhism calls it feeding the fire of the mind.
🔑 The Core Teaching:
“Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional.” — The Buddha
Non-reaction is strength, not weakness.
Every reaction gives your power to the world.
Reactivity shrinks you. Non-reaction expands you.
You can stop being a thermometer (always reacting) and become a thermostat (setting your emotional temperature).
🧘♂️ The Goal: Equanimity (Upekkhā)
A calm, balanced, unshakable mind.
Stay centered in conflict, still in chaos.
Respond with clarity, not impulse.
⚡ What You Lose by Reacting
Mental clarity
Emotional energy
Peaceful sleep
Confidence and respect
🛠️ How to Practice Non-Reaction
The 5-Step Method
Notice the trigger Recognize the moment reactivity starts.
Pause Take a breath. Create space before reacting.
Feel, don’t fuel Let emotions rise—but don’t feed them stories.
Choose your response Ask: What would calm, wise me do?
Reflect Review: Where did you stay calm? Where did you react?
🧘♀️ Example in Action
Someone sends a rude text.
Impulse: Fire back a reply.
Non-reaction: Pause. Breathe. Maybe don’t reply at all.
Result: Your peace stays intact. That’s power.
🌊 The Shift
Stop leaking energy.
Stop letting small things control big emotions.
Start mastering your mind.
🕊 Close Your Eyes and Imagine...
A life where:
No insult disturbs you.
No failure breaks you.
No chaos shakes you.
Because you’ve mastered the art of non-reaction.
So here is my question: If we strive for Non-Reaction, what do we do with the emotions that we know are going to be present. We will feel pain, we will feel anger, we will feel many things, it is human nature. From what I understand thus far, the pause we are able to take before reacting at all will allow me to process the moment and react with a higher level of intention. I posed this question and got this:
Here’s how this is typically understood in both Buddhist philosophy and modern emotional intelligence frameworks:
✅ Non-Reaction Does Not Mean Non-Feeling
Non-reaction is not emotional suppression.You’re not expected to become a robot. You will feel. The goal is to not be ruled by the emotion.
The key is the pause, just as you said.In that pause, you:
Let the emotion arise.
Let it be seen, felt, and acknowledged.
But you don’t act from it impulsively.
“You can’t stop the waves, but you can learn to surf.” — Jon Kabat-Zinn
🌊 What Happens in the Pause?
In the pause between trigger and response, you give yourself space to:
Feel the emotion honestly (“I’m angry right now.”)
Witness it without fueling it (no internal monologue like “They always do this!”)
Let it move through the body without needing to fix it immediately.
Choose intentional action, or sometimes no action at all.
🧘 What You’re Practicing is Emotional Integration, Not Suppression
You’re not pushing feelings away.
You’re allowing them to rise, move through, and pass—without becoming them.
This is what transforms emotional energy into wisdom.
🔥 Example: Feeling Anger Without Reacting From It
Let’s say someone says something hurtful.
You feel anger arise in your chest.
You pause. Breathe. Recognize: This is anger. It’s valid. But I don’t have to act it out.
You choose: Do I need to say something? Do I need to walk away? Or just breathe?
You haven’t suppressed the emotion.You’ve transmuted it into clarity.
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